


I Promise to Live for You, My Friend

by Hikage_Phoenix



Category: Toy Soldiers (1991)
Genre: Aftermath, Angst, Best Friends, Canonical Character Death, Funeral, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Post-Movie, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-23
Updated: 2019-11-23
Packaged: 2021-02-18 17:33:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21530668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hikage_Phoenix/pseuds/Hikage_Phoenix
Summary: It’s the aftermath of the terrorist scare, and Billy is finally coming down from his adrenaline high, giving him time to reflect on the most important person who didn’t make it out.
Relationships: Billy Tepper/Joey Trotta
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	I Promise to Live for You, My Friend

**Author's Note:**

> I watched Toy Soldiers almost 2 years ago, and it made a very big impression on me after seeing how Joey died, since I seem to have the misfortune of loving the best friend characters who end up dying. Somehow I came back to the fandom, and I decided I wanted to write a fix-it fic. Before that, though, I wrote this fic to get my feelings out on how the ending affected me.

It was finally over. Regis High School was free. The students streamed out onto the quad in celebration, with Billy in the center. He was their hero, their savior. Billy hugged all of his friends who helped make it happen. Snuffy, Ric, Hank, Yogurt, and…

He stopped, and glanced around. This wasn’t right, this wasn’t how it was supposed to end. Because _he_ wasn’t by his side, like he was supposed to be. Billy’s eyes roamed until they met those of Dean Parker. The man’s face was clouded in sympathy, and he walked over as Billy separated himself from the crowd. Billy looked up at him with a resigned sadness.

“I want to see him.”

It wasn’t a question of whether he could or not.

“Joey has been returned to his father,” Parker said as he placed a firm hand on Billy’s shoulder and squeezed. “I will see to it that you and the boys will be able to attend his funeral.”

\--------------------------------------------------

_“JOEY!!!”_

_Billy screamed as he watched the bullets tear through his best friend’s body. Joey stumbled backwards on the stairs, gun slipping from his hands. Billy made to run after him but Hank grabbed him around the waist, pulling him away from the line of fire. Tears burned in his eyes as he watched the blood spill from Joey’s chest and the light die from his eyes._

_How did it turn out like this? Joey had only left for a minute, led back into the school by one of the terrorists. Billy worried about what they wanted with him, but he could hardly imagine that Joey would come bursting back through those same doors not long after, fury and desperation blazing in his eyes and a stolen gun in his hands._

_Once Hank loosened his grip, Billy tore free and dashed to Joey, the other boys following behind him. He frantically scanned Joey’s face and body, but it was too late. Joey was already dead. He’d never see those beautiful hazel eyes look at him, or hear his voice laugh with him, ever again._

_Billy gently closed Joey’s eyes, then grasped his hand and held him close as sobs wracked his body. He hardly registered Luis’ voice yelling something at the other terrorists, who came over to usher the boys away from the body. They obediently stepped away except for Billy, who had to be persuaded away from Joey by one of terrorists brandishing his gun. He glanced back through the closing doors as he entered the school, seeing one of the men lifting Joey’s lifeless body from the stairs. His blood stained the steps, leaving behind a gruesome reminder of what had transpired. Billy didn’t know if he would ever be able to walk on them again._

\--------------------------------------------------

Albert Trotta had never really approved of his son’s choice of best friend, as he thought Joey could do better than a ruffian like Billy. But he didn’t try to persuade the boy otherwise, since Joey was genuinely happy with Billy, and he didn’t want to deny his son that happiness. Joey had already hated him enough as it was.

He allowed everyone from the school to attend Joey’s funeral, and for that Billy was grateful. It seems like Dean Parker had said something else to him too, because Billy was allowed a private moment with Joey before the actual funeral.

After stepping into the room containing Joey’s casket, Billy almost wanted nothing more than to run back out because now it was really hitting home that Joey was dead. He moved forward anyway, kneeling down beside the box so he could look more closely at Joey’s face.

Joey looked peaceful, as if he were only sleeping. The blood had been cleaned up, and Joey was dressed in a plain black suit with his hands folded over his chest. Billy reached in and pulled one of Joey’s hands close to him, pressing a kiss to the cold knuckles.

He had heard from Parker that Albert had made some sort of deal with the terrorists to let Joey go, and they complied due to their respect for the mob boss. But Joey refused to leave, resulting in him assaulting one of the terrorists and stealing his gun when they tried to force him.

 _Why didn’t you save yourself, dammit!_ Billy thought as he gazed at Joey’s face. _If you had gone, you’d still be alive now._ At the same time Billy felt touched at Joey’s loyalty towards him and the other boys, refusing to leave and be the only one who was safe and out of danger. But look where it got him. There would never be any more nighttime shenanigans, sneaking out for pranks, Joey helping him with schoolwork, Joey laughing at his jokes…

He stroked Joey’s cheek, hating how cold it was, then his hand came to rest on his left ear. Whoever cleaned up the body had decided to leave his earring on. Billy paused for a moment, turning the little silver cross around in his fingers. As he stood up to leave, he unfastened the earring from Joey’s ear and slipped it into his pocket.

During the funeral, Billy felt numb as he watched Joey’s casket being slowly lowered into the ground. Phil stood beside him, shocked after hearing what happened at the school during his absence. Billy was glad he had left, since things might have been worse if the terrorists had been able to get their hands on their original target. He only wished he could say the same for Joey.

Seeing Albert Trotta standing there now, saying something that Billy couldn’t hear, he felt a sudden rush of anger towards the man.

He shouldn’t have interfered. If he hadn’t tried to remove Joey on his own, then Joey wouldn’t have acted rashly, and he wouldn’t have been killed.

 _We would have taken care of him,_ Billy thought furiously. _I would have protected him._

 _But you didn’t,_ his mind supplied unhelpfully, and he was immediately crushed by a sense of guilt for his thoughts as he looked at Albert again.

The man was the picture of unbridled grief, tears falling from his face. His shoulders shook and his hands trembled as he tried to stay calm. Billy stared, his own eyes wet, as he saw not a mob boss but a father who was grieving for his son. Despite Joey’s hatred for his father, the man clearly loved him and had only been doing everything he could to try and keep his son safe. Billy couldn’t blame him. In the end Joey was still gone and that wouldn’t change.

\--------------------------------------------------

Back in his dorm room, Billy sat on his bed, staring blankly at the wall. Phil had moved back in, but now it was only the two of them. Billy had vehemently insisted to Parker that he didn’t want anyone to replace Joey in their room, and Parker agreed. Joey’s personal belongings had been removed, but Billy had requested to keep his sketchbook which now lay on his desk.

Standing up, Billy walked to his desk and removed the stud from his ear. He reached into his pocket and pulled out Joey’s cross, affixing it to his ear instead.

_I promise I will live for you too, Joey._

**Author's Note:**

> Now that I finished this fic, I will be working on a longer fix-it fic where Joey survives.


End file.
